Sunday, December 7, 2008

the letter P...brought to you by the evil muppets masquerading as parliamentarians

Where to begin, where to begin?
Pinheads springs to mind...
It's the sad hangover of having studied Political science (why yes, all the P's will appear in capitals just to underscore the point...): I EXPECT BETTER

Prorogue...glroious little turn of phrase...but emphasis on the world ROGUE in all that....

I expect elected Members of Parliament to understand the subtle nuances of Parliamentary Procedure. I'd settle for them understanding that Parliamentary Democracy differs from the Republican version in effect south of the 49th where voters do cast a distinct vote for their Commander-In-Chief then carry on casting distinct votes for all their officials until they get to judges and dogcatchers.

I expect the Prime Minister (ou Le Ministere Premier si vous parlez francais meilleur que je parles...) to behave like a leader of government...and I expect that to be immediately distinguishable from the average, sullen schoolyard bully who Pitches a fit and decides that football will be a five-down game because it's his ball...

I expect that when his minions are Permitted to appear on assorted networks offering their thoughtful Perspectives on issues at hand, they will not arbitarily spit out inflammatory terms including treason and sedition as pouring gasoline on any fire is never a Particularly clever notion.
(But clever is not a word I would ascribe to any of the People we Pay to represent our interests in Ottawa these days.) Last I checked, Canada was a Participatory Democracy where dissenting viewpoints were Permitted and tolerated. (Note: tolerance is in shorter supply than hops and common sense these days...)

While I don't typically vote Conservative I do vote...and let me be clear, I don't like most of the other options either...except the Green one...and the former Rhinos...
And sadly, you can't vote Conservative federally any longer as the Alliance movement has hijacked that option...
And just for the record, I'm reasonably certain I have cast a Conservative vote before...for Gary Filmon...a cool Premier whose son played basketball for the University of Manitoba Bisons...which I know because Proud Dad was often in gyms watching his boy Play.
I like Geddy, Lougheed and Klein...I like Bernard Lord...and Joe Clark was a big missed opportunity for this country...and a heck of an impressive statesman after the fact...
But then, they were all gentle people with manners and sense...kind of Polite...

Sweater Diplomacy is not new to me...
Manitoba invented it...when the Gary Guys (Filmon and Doer) trade wardrobes (the PC wore a sweater while the NDP chap wore a suit -- oh wait, another P...Progressive...what conservatives used to be...)
It's rather like the Principle behind Dr. Suess's Sneetches...if you remove and replace stars on the bellies of those who started with and without them, in the end, you can't tell one Sneetch from the other...

Of the P's in evidence this week, it's hard to tell what's sadder...Polarization (leaving Polar bears to Paddle while their Arctic ice sheets and the economy burn...) which occurs when zealots spin an Poisonous frenzy to Pit extreme interests against one another and Pour gasoline on a fire...

Ah, but we've neglected on big P (with apologies for the suggestion of bodily function...although the breaking of wind might be Preferable to the other hijinx in evidence this week...)

Pusilanimous...weak of timid...in a bullyish Pipsqueaky kind of way...
Parody...what we've been seeing rather than a useful, effective government...
Procrastination...a lead in to another term we've yet to explore...
Principle...not a one in evidence anywhere...Principal...what we'd like to hire Deborah Gray to come to Ottawa and be for a bit...
Paralysis...what occurs when nothing occurs...kinda like now...
How about Parallax....an apparent difference in Position or direction of an object caused when the observer's Position is changed...
And here's a tidy little Phrase...Pay the Piper. Canadian's continue to Pay the Freight while nothing but snarking and fussing occurs...
Partner...no such thing in the halls of government...not any more...
Not with Propaganda flying like holiday greeting cards...
Privateers...highly Partisan Pirates hired by some monarchy or Privileged interests to misbehave Publicly.
Public Interest...gone in one Economic Update (including -- free of charge -- one union busting backhand and a funding conundrum....)

Here's a P with Possibility: Peter MacKay. He's got a good dog...he's got nice manners...he bears indignity with grace and guts...and he's a great favourite of Condoleeza Rice (who ventured to Tim Horton's with him...)...nobody has a Draft Pete site up yet -- a measure of his integrity.

Here's another P that merits consideration...Pigs...no, no, not like that...Napolean and Snowball...check Animal Farm if the reference eludes you...check Pork barrelling just for fun....

But here's the P sure to rule the day...Pathetic...that's what it is...Pathetic...as Eeyore used to intone...

As Winston Churchill once observed, the best argument against democracy (which gives you an intriguing typo demoncracy if you misstrike...) is a five minute conversation with the average voter...but it remains Preferable to most alternatives...

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